I am at the age where my friends are suddenly having children. I have even been asked to be a godfather, although I am still learning the rules of what you can and can't say. Recently my friend was telling me about his new baby boy.
'He's got a new sound that he does,' he said, looking pale and tired. 'He just sits there and goes NYUP. NYUP. NYUP. For hours and hours. He was making it all last night. NYUP. NYUP. NYUP.'
He smiled weakly, in a 'What can you do?' kind of way. I tried to sympathise.
'He sounds like a dick,' I said.
My friend just looked at me.
'But he did,' I said to my wife, as she silently collected our things.
Awkward Situations For Men - Danny Wallace